my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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