is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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