I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
