Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
