she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
