Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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