i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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