You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
