So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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