Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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