Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
