Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(803): View more from South Carolina

definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask

Fav 11 4927 958
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(213): View more from California

I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.

Fav 21 6673 1823
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".

Fav 22 4057 1699
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(618): View more from Illinois

She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.

Fav 13 4491 1308
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(510): View more from California

You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink

Fav 3 3096 1046
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT

Fav 11 2006 803
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(239): View more from Florida

Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.

Fav 0 579 361
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(323): View more from California

I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time

Fav 0 106 7
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