Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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