At least make sure they are 18
Why
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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