spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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