Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
