I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
