Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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