dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize