I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
