It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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