Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
