I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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