The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
