It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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