either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
