Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
