thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
