Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
