He uses pillows to masturbate.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize