ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
