I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
