The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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