Sry I called you an 8
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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