Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
