Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
