Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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