i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
