Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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