im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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