I want to stick my p in your. b.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize