..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
