Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
