Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize