This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
