chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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