Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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