I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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