Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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