Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
