Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Randomize
